Please Don't Go
by guineagirl5
Summary: O.C. X Ian. Riley, a friend of Ian Hecox, is hit with a terrible tragedy when her parents are murdered. In attempt to cheer her up, Ian comforts her in ways a best friend only can. But what if he wanted to be more?
1. No One Deserves to be Alone

**A/N: Sooooo, this is my first fanfic... I hope you enjoy it! Reviews are much appreciated!**

~Riley's POV~

_ How could this happen to me? What did I do to deserve this? _I wondered, as I watched blurry eyed the scene that unfolded in front of me. Two body bags, being carried out of my childhood home, made me break down in uncontrollable sobs.

"Mom... Dad..." I murmured.

"Matt and Tanya Smith were killed late last night, when a burglar broke into their home at around 11:30 PM. They were both fatally shot, when Matt tried to subdue the criminal with Tanya behind him. We haven't gotten anymore details, but we will tell you as we learn more." I heard a reporter say. "Matt and Tanya are survived by their 20 year old daughter, Riley Smith."

Hearing all of this made me cry even more. I would not be able to look at that house the same way ever again. I had been at the crime scene all day, answering questions to the best of my ability, talking to people who gave their condolences, and overall just sitting in shock. I soon heard running footsteps behind me, and someone shouting my name. I recognized it instantly. I looked to see my best friend, Ian, running towards me. The police held him back, not letting him pass the tape.

"Riley!" He shouted.

"It's ok, he's with me!" I told them. They let him duck under the tape, and he ran over to me, tears streaming down his face as well as mine. He instantly grabbed me in a tight but gentle hug.

"I'm so sorry," he sobbed. I would add this to the list of the few times I'd seen him cry. He didn't let go for what seemed like forever. I could tell Ian was trying to block my view of any further horror. I pulled slightly away, so I could see his blue eyes. Even in the dark conditions, I could see they weren't as bright. "Come on, It's late," He whispered. He grabbed my hand and pulled me towards his car.

~Ian's POV~

I tried not to cry, but tears fell silently down my face. Mr. and Mrs. Smith were like second parents to me. I looked straight ahead, wanting to be brave for Riley. Looking at her would make me break down. I headed towards my house instead of her apartment. I pulled into my driveway, and into the garage. I turned the car off, as we both unbuckled our seat belts. We sat in silence for what seemed an eternity.

"Why are we at your house?" She suddenly broke the silence.

"I think we need each other. At least for tonight," I murmured. She nodded, keeping her head down. I slowly got out of the car, and walked to her side. I opened the door and helped her out, gazing into her beautiful green eyes. We walked inside and she instantly broke down on the couch. I sat next to her, and she buried her head into my shoulder, stifling her sobs.

"Shhhh..." I tried to sooth her. I knew that at this point nothing would work. I saw Anthony walk slowly into the living room, looking solemn.

"I'm so sorry Riley," He said. I could tell he had no idea what to say.

"Thanks... mind if I stay here tonight?" She mumbled through sobs.

"Not at all. I'll grab some blankets and stuff." He said to me. I nodded lightly. Anthony came back out carrying a fluffy pillow and blanket. I settled the pillow behind Riley, and wrapped her in the blanket. She sat there hugging her knees, rocking back and forth as I did my best to comfort her. I felt helpless.

"Hold on," I said. I got up and went to my room. I ripped my own pillow and 2 blankets from the bed, and walked back to my best friend. She was still sitting just like I left her.

"What are you doing?" She asked.

"No one deserves to be alone on a night like this," I said softly.

~Riley's POV~

He placed one of the blankets on the floor, and laid down wrapped in the other. I did the same on the couch. He gently grabbed my hand.

"Things will get better. I promise," He gave my hand a slight squeeze and closed his eyes. He kept my hand in his as I tried to drift off to sleep, letting out a little sob every once in a while. Slowly, my parents faces came into view.

I was in a dark room... I could barely make out the white cloths that hung all over the walls. A door creaked open, letting light spill into the room. A man walked in, and he had something in his right hand.

"Hello?" I asked. "What are you doing?" He didn't say a word. He just lifted the evil metal object, his finger resting on the trigger. I heard the sharp crack, and saw the blinding flash of light. I looked down. A circle the size of a nickle went through my abdomen, and I felt an unbearable pain. I was writhing on the floor, as he stood over my crippled body. He just laughed. The most heartless laugh I have ever heard. It was like I was a comedy act. Everything went dark.

I heard screaming. It sounded like I was the person doing it, but I also heard a familiar voice. Ian's voice.

"RILEY!" I opened my eyes to see Ian standing over me, shaking me by the shoulders. He looked extremely worried. I heard running feet coming down the hall, and suddenly I see Anthony looking terrified, holding a bat.

"WHERE IS HE?!" He shouted. He relaxed when he saw that we were the only ones in the room. "GEEZ, you scared me," He said. He lowered his bat, walked over, and sat on the couch next to us. "Are you ok?" He asked softly.

"Yeah..." I put my head in my hands, trying to forget the nightmare. Ian gave me a quick hug, then walked to the kitchen. I looked at the clock. 3:00 AM. Way to early to be screaming bloody murder. Then, like a flood, the events of yesterday came back to my mind.

~Ian's POV~

I walked quietly into the kitchen, and opened the cupboard that holds our various mugs. Riley needed something to make her feel better and calm down. I made some hot-chocolate, and added my signature touches. A pile of whipped cream, some cinnamon, and a little bit of candy cane. I walked back out to see Anthony trying to comfort her as her shoulders shook. I couldn't bear to see her this way.

"I made some hot cocoa," I said hesitantly. God, I had no idea what to do for her.

"Thanks," She sniffled. She wasn't crying as hard as I thought she would. I guess she just ran out of tears. Anthony gave me a look that said "you can take over." I took his spot as he quietly walked to his room. We sat together, saying nothing. We couldn't. She slowly sipped at her cocoa, looking at the wall, a blank look on her face. She eventually set down her cup and drifted off to sleep again, leaning on me. I did the same.

I woke up several hours later, to see Riley sleeping peacefully. I was happy to see her relaxed again. But I knew it wouldn't last long. I gently lifted her head off of my shoulder, and laid her back down on the pillow. She looked more tired than I had ever seen her, shadows forming under her eyes. But she didn't lose any of her beauty. Anthony was the only one who knew, but I had had a crush on her ever since I met her in 5th grade.

I shuffled down the hall to my room/editing station. _Oh crap! The fans have no idea whats going on. _I thought. I ran my fingers through my bowl hair cut, so I looked more presentable. I grabbed our small hand-held camera and started filming.

"Hey guys. I thought I should let you all know that no videos will be released at all this week. If you live in the area, you might have heard about the two people who were killed in a robbery attempt. Those people just so happened to be my friends parents..." I felt tears starting to well in my eyes. I willed myself to keep going. "Please pray for her and her family. This is a very tough time, so out of respect for that don't expect anything this week. Again, thanks," I finished. That was the most serious video I had ever done. I felt my face get hot, and a single tear fell down my cheek. At least it didn't happen during the video.

I laid the camera back on the desk, with a note telling Anthony to upload it. I went back to the living room, relieved Riley was still sleeping. I didn't want to cause her more pain by hearing that.


	2. Promises

**A/N: TRIGGER WARNING. The second chapter in the Please Don't Go story. Sorry, this one is a little sad, but it just kinda happened... Enjoy!**

**~Riley's POV~**

I woke up to the smell of bacon. I didn't feel the familiar comfort of Ian, just the pillow under my head. He must of left to get some stuff done. I lifted my head slightly to see Anthony sitting at the table on his laptop, and Ian cooking at the stove, his back turned to me. My eyes still drooped, wanting to close and stay away from my tragic reality, wanting to go back to my dream world where everything was perfect. At least thats how it was when Ian was there.

"Well, good morning sleepy head," I was broken from my trance by Ian looking over his shoulder at me. I could tell he was just trying to sound cheerful for me. There was still a certain twinge of pain in his voice.

"Good morning," I said flatly. I sat up and rubbed my eyes, getting the traces of tears of off my face. I tried to smile, but my muscles wouldn't work. They must have taken the week off.

"I'm making breakfast. Bacon and eggs, your favorite," he said. It was true. I had always had a weakness for that breakfast combination.

I trudged to the table, sitting in the chair across from Anthony, still staring at his screen. He looked like he wasn't in the mood to talk. Of course he never was most mornings. Ian scooped eggs onto several plates, and placed slices of bacon on each one. I didn't have the heart to tell him I wasn't hungry. He grabbed a plate, and set it in front of me with a fork, and a glass of orange juice.

"Thanks," I said half-heartedly.

The two of them started eating their own eggs, while I sat there staring at the plate. I grabbed the fork, stabbed at a piece egg a little too violently, and put it in my mouth. It tasted like wet cardboard. Anthony complemented Ian on the taste enthusiastically, so I knew it was just me. I took a bite out of the bacon, just so Ian wouldn't be worried. In the back of my mind I knew he would be anyway.

I pushed the plate away from me. Looking at food just made my stomach ache. I watched as Ian and Anthony finished everything from their plate, and drained their glass of orange juice. I took a sip of the juice to look like I was the least bit interested, then set it back on the table. It tasted like nothing, like I had just drank air. Again, I knew it was just me and my grief.

**~Ian's POV~**

I looked out of the corner of my eye to see Riley staring blankly at her food. One bite of bacon gone, her fork sitting on her plate with one little piece of egg on it, and barely any juice gone. That was so unusual for her. She had always been a good eater, she ate more than me sometimes. She pushed her plate away, the same blank expression on her face.

"Are you ok?" I whispered. She looked up at me with her dull green eyes. They weren't as vibrant as I remembered. She nodded slowly, and told me she just wasn't hungry. I tried not to pry too much, so I took her plate away, watching her take out her phone and stare at it.

"I have to go talk about the funeral plans with my grandparents today," She said.

"Do you need me to go with you?" I thought maybe having me along might make it more comfortable for her. She shook her head.

"My Grandpa Smith is going to pick me up. I better get ready," She mumbled. She got up and started putting the things she needed into her purse, as I put the dishes in the sink. I could tell I needed to keep a close eye on her to make sure she didn't do anything stupid.

A little while later, a minivan rolled into the driveway, and gave a small beep of the horn. I looked to see an elderly man sitting in the front seat, with the same blank expression on his face as Riley. Riley got up off the couch and walked over to me.

"Wish me luck," she said. She gave me a tight hug.

"Good luck," She let go, and headed out the front door, walking slowly to the minivan. She got in and they drove away.

"Hey Anthony, did you upload that video?" I yelled.

"Yeah, but you might want to see this,"

**~Riley's POV~**

My grandpa and I sat in an awkward silence. I wasn't sure what to say, and I don't think he had the slightest idea what to say either. I opened my mouth a couple of times, getting ready to say a comforting word, but then always chickened out, looking ahead at the stretch of road again.

We arrived at my Mom's parents house after ten minutes of driving, although it might as well have been half an hour. I hugged every grandparent, trying to smile, but finding my muscles failing me again.

"Would you like some snacks, Sweetie? Are you hungry?" My Grandma Davis asked the generic questions.

"No, Ian made me a huge breakfast," I wasn't lying. He did. I was just lying about the fact that I barely ate any of it. We went and sat in their spacious living room, with all of the little antique knick-knacks they had collected over the years. The selves on the walls held memories of their past adventures, as well as the little weird things they found along the way.

"Well I know this has been hard on all of us," Grandma Davis started. "But we need to power through, and figure out what we need to do," She said with her glassy eyes. She looked like she had cried recently, but was holding it back now. I had always admired that about her, she could put on a somewhat happy face in the worst times. Unlike me. I sat there with the same expression I had had all morning.

"I think we should start with..." I spaced out for the rest, and only gave the occasional nod, or head shake, following everyone elses example.

After a while, we all decided we needed a break. Everyone stood up, stretched, went to the bathroom and whatnot. I stood up from the cushiony chair, my vision instantly filling with black, and multicolored dots. I reached my hand out to the arm of the chair, waiting for the dizziness to pass. This had happened before, just not this bad. I passed it off as getting up too fast.

"You ok, Sweetie?" Grandma Davis had a concerned look on her face.

"Yeah," I shook my head fast, getting the last of the black away from my eyes. "I think I just got up too fast," I tried to give a smile that probably turned out like a grimace.

"Ok...Let me know if you need anything," She gave me a quick peck on the cheek and walked away.

**~Ian's POV~**

"What's wrong?" I basically trotted to the editing station, to see Anthony looking at our most recent, and most serious video. Anthony turned around with a half sad, half pissed off face.

"These comments aren't what we were hoping for," He moved aside so I could get a better view of the screen, and have access to the mouse. I started scrolling, and my heart broke. A lot of the comments were supportive, saying things like, "I'm so sorry Ian, give condolences to your friend!" Others were saying they still wanted videos, "I'm sorry Ian! But you should still post videos... This doesn't concern SMOSH,"

Then there were the ones that tore my heart to pieces.

"I don't care about this bitch, Ian! WE WANT MORE VIDS!"

"SHE CAN DEAL WITH IT BY HERSELF IAN! COME ON, Where's the new Lunchtime?!"

"You never miss a vid! Come on Ian, that slut can wait,"

I stared in shock. There were more of those types of comments than I cared to see. I was normally able to ignore these comments and move on with my life. But these were insulting my best friend, and the girl I loved. I felt the tears start to prick my eyes. Obviously they weren't real fans if they reacted this way, but at the same time I wanted to punch the computer screen, and get revenge on those people. I felt my face burning with rage and sadness.

"Anthony," I said quickly. "Do NOT let Riley see this. It would ruin her, she knows how important SMOSH is to us. She would try something stupid," I ran my hand through my bowl haircut, wondering how I could keep her from seeing this at all costs. It would be nearly impossible. She subscribed to us, she watched every one of our videos. We were her go-to if she was sad.

"I'll keep her occupied when she gets home, but you need to take that video down tomorrow," I went and sat on the couch, waiting for her to get home.

I woke up to the squealing of brakes in the driveway. I must have dozed off. I dashed to the door to welcome Riley back in, ready to give a hug if she needed one. I opened the door seeing Riley pause after she stood up, and shaking her head. _That's odd... _I thought. She slowly walked to the door, definitely not acting like the Riley I knew.

"Hey," She mumbled as she walked through the door. She accepted my hug, then went and plopped on the couch, me following behind her. She leaned into me tiredly, and I could tell she would just fall asleep. I didn't have to worry about her seeing the video.

**~Riley's POV~**

Blinking a couple of times, my vision adjusted to the darkness. I felt Ian's warmth that always made me feel safe. I lifted my head to look at the clock on the kitchen wall, and found that it said 2:00 AM. _Great. Another sleepless night for Riley. _I thought. I shimmied my way out from under Ian's arm, and felt my way to the bathroom, again battling the feeling of dizziness. I nearly screamed when I flipped on the light. I looked horrific. I looked like I hadn't slept in weeks, the dark circles under my eyes growing darker, my eyes bloodshot, and my hair a greasy mess.

"Maybe I should take a shower," I said to myself. I realized it was only 2 AM for one thing, and that I didn't know where the towels were. I guess I would just have to wait. I padded into Ian's room, heading for the desk his computer sat on. I wanted to see him happy again, watch the lunchtimes with smosh where he would go crazy and laugh. I missed that Ian.

I logged into my youtube, and clicked on "My Subscriptions". SMOSH was the only one on my list. I was surprised when I saw a new video pop up. It was titled "Taking a Break". It didn't have a funny thumbnail like usual, just Ian's face looking at the camera. I clicked it.

"Hey guys. I thought I should let you all know that no videos will be released at all this week. If you live in the area, you might have heard about the two people who were killed in a robbery attempt. Those people just so happened to be my friends parents..." He paused, looking like he took some deep breaths. "Please pray for her and her family. This is a very tough time, so out of respect for that don't expect anything this week. Again, thanks,"

A quiet sob escaped my lips, as I clamped my hand over my mouth. I caused him to put SMOSH on hold? What about his fans? What would they think? I soon found my answer. I scrolled to see nasty comments, calling me a "Bitch" and a "Slut". I was hurting their career... More importantly I was causing Ian and Anthony pain. I looked around frantically, trying to find something to punch, to hit, to take my anger and pain out on. I jumped on Ian's bed and started punching Ian's pillow and stuffed Pikachu that they used in so many videos. It wasn't enough. I needed release. I needed to feel pain. I rushed into their kitchen, surprisingly not making a sound. I pulled the drawer that held the sharp objects, the knifes, open, and pulled one out.

I promised myself no matter how bad things got, I would never do it. I didn't think I would ever have the guts. But there I was standing, staring at this evil object. I looked over my shoulder to see Ian still asleep. Good. He didn't need to see this. I tip-toed to the bathroom, my heart racing. _Don't do it... _I told myself. _Riley, don't do it. _I closed the door behind me and locked it. I wasn't listening to my brains warnings.I stepped into the bathtub, and rolled up my hoodie sleeve. I pressed the knife softly to my skin, testing it. I let out a little scream at the pain, and it hadn't even started bleeding.

"Riley? What are you doing?" I heard a knock and Ian's voice at the door.

~Ian's POV~

I woke up to the sound of a door shutting, and the lock clicking. I wasn't as warm as I was earlier, and I realized Riley wasn't curled up next to me anymore. The clock on the kitchen wall said 2:10 AM. I heard a squeak come from the bathroom. I could tell it was Riley. I rushed to the bathroom door.

"Riley? What are you doing?" I knocked. I heard nothing but her heavy breath through the door. "Riley? Tell me now," I was nearly shouting now.

"GO AWAY!" She screamed. I heard sobbing afterward. I heard her squeal again. I had to get in there.

"Riley! Get away from the door!" I backed up against the opposite wall, and positioned myself with my shoulder facing forwards. I ran at the door, my shoulder ramming into the wood. I heard a crack in the door. It was going down if it killed me. Anthony ran out of his room, dazed, shocked at what was happening before him. I rubbed my shoulder, ignoring him as I backed up against the wall again.

"IAN!" He finally came out of his trance. "What's going on?"

"Riley is in there, and I don't know what she's doing, probably killing herself, I HAVE to get in there!" I said quickly. I ran at the door again, bracing for the crushing pain I would feel in my shoulder. The latch on the door broke, sending splinters of wood across the floor. My shoulder throbbed, but that was the least of my worries. Riley was crouching in a ball in the bathtub, a knife in one hand. I collapsed at her side.

"RILEY!" I screamed. she wasn't majorly hurt. Just one small slit on her left wrist. I softly reached for the knife. She handed it slowly over to me, and I gave it to Anthony who was standing behind me. I hugged her tighter and more protectively than I ever had before.

My relief faded and turned into a slight anger.

"What were you thinking? Why didn't you just talk to me? Why?" I sobbed. I realized I was shaking her by the shoulders.

"I don't know what to do Ian... I feel lost, and now you put SMOSH on hold for me. I don't know how to cope anymore," She said a tear running down her face. "On top of that, I won't see my parents ever again,"

I hugged her again, as we just sat there not saying a word. I finally broke the silence.

"I'm always here for you Riley. I always will be, and that won't ever change. The fans can wait, you are my top priority right now. Just don't do anything stupid like this again. Promise me." I sobbed silently.

"Promise," She reached her pinky out, and I hooked my pinky with hers. We hadn't used the pinky promise in forever but it seemed appropriate. If only I could tell her how I truly feel. That would make our promise so much stronger.

**A/N: AHHH Not gonna lie this one really messed with my feelings. More to come! As always, Please review!**


	3. The Arcade

**A/N: So I've been a writing machine, and it is now 1:00 Am. Here is the next chapter! Look forward to some fluff!**

**~Riley's POV~**

I opened my eyes, my arm stinging from last night. It was all a blur to me, the last thing I remembered was how I hooked pinky's with Ian, promising him I wouldn't try anything like that again. I tried to remember what happened after, but all I could think of was the stinging pain from the antiseptic. I noticed something different. I looked around at my surroundings. I wasn't in the living room, I was in Ian's room, laying curled against his chest on his bed. I was still in my jeans, but my hoodie was gone, leaving me in my Seether T-shirt. My left wrist was crudely wrapped in medical tape and gauze, but it looks like it did the job.

I didn't want to move. Ian made me feel so safe, even though I felt like the whole world was out to get me. I curled into a tighter ball, hoping he would stay asleep a little while longer, so I could linger in his warmth. Of course, I didn't get my wish. Ian mumbled, while he sat up and rubbed his eyes. I wish I could tell him how I felt. _No. _My mind said. _It will ruin your friendship, don't do it. _This time I listened.

"Morning," Ian yawned. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah," I said disappointedly. "What happened last night?" I sat up and rubbed my own eyes, feeling how puffy they were from exhaustion.

"What do you remember?" He asked hesitantly. He gave me a worried look.

"Our pinky promise," I said. He blushed a little. "And you bandaging my cut,"

"You asked to sleep in here last night," He looked away. "You told me to stay,"

"Oh," I said softly. "Thank you," I couldn't help but look at his blue eyes. They looked like they had gotten brighter overnight.

He hesitated before smiling, "What are friends for?" _Friends. _I thought. He awkwardly climbed over my legs and off the bed.

"Want something to eat?" He pierced me with his eyes once again.

"Uhh, sure," I said. I was feeling a bit better. But I knew I still wouldn't eat as much as I was supposed to. I swung my legs off the bed so they were touching the floor. The black hit my eyes again. Not as strong as yesterday, but it worried me that it was happening while I was still sitting. I walked slowly out of his bedroom and into the kitchen, sitting at the table.

"I'm making pancakes," He said. He had his back turned to me while he worked at the stove. I guess I never realized how much he cooked. On all of their Lunchtimes with SMOSH, it was always fast food. I saw Anthony walk in from the hall, running his fingers through his hair.

"Morning," He said cheerfully. He walked over to the cupboard where they kept the cups, and grabbed one of the tall ones. Maybe I was imagining it, but I thought I saw him smirk at Ian.

"So, Riley," Ian said while setting down a plate in front of me. "Anything planned today?"

I thought about it for a minute. "No," I finally said. I cut a small piece out of the pancake and ate it. It tasted better but I still wasn't hungry.

"Do you wanna go to that arcade down the street? They have all of the old school games like 'Donkey Kong' and 'Pac Man'," He looked hopefully at me. I couldn't say no.

"Sure. But why? Didn't you wanna hang around here today?" I ate another small piece of pancake.

"I thought it would be good to get out of the house, go do something fun... you know," He smiled that smile that would be the death of me.

**~Ian's POV~**

Riley and I got in the car, and headed for the arcade. I let her borrow one of my sweaters. Her's was still in the laundry from last night. I realized it had been 2 nights since she started staying with us, but it made sense. She had no roommate, no one to comfort her when she was home. She just chose to stay with us, and in the back of my mind I hoped, with me. I pulled into the arcade driveway and parked in the nearest spot.

"Here we are," I said in a fancy voice. I looked over to see her lips turn up a little bit. I was glad the glow was coming back to her face. I walked over to her side of the car and opened the door, helping her out.

"What do you want to play first?" She asked looking around as we walked in the door. I saw Galaga, Donkey Kong, Pac Man, and some newer arcade games like you might see at Chuck E. Cheeses.

"How about we start with that one?" I pointed at Mortal Kombat, one of my all time favorites. She nodded as she walked towards the vacant machine. I put in enough quarters for both of us, and we started to play. I was Johnny Cage, while she was Sonya Blade. I beat her the first two rounds and won the match. She lightly shoved me in the arm.

"Ow!" I said playfully. She smiled bigger than she did in the car. I could tell she was coming out of her depression, at least for the time being. And for that I was grateful.

"Can we play again?" She looked at me with her pleading green eyes.

"Oh, fine," I said in mock reluctance. I put in more quarters, and we chose the same characters. That time she won all three rounds. I looked at her with a fake frown.

"You were holding out on me!" I said as I smiled. She looked at me sideways, grinning as she did so.

"Maybe..." She said slowly.

"When did you get so good?" I had to know. Her face fell. She looked down at her hands, and her eyes fluttered. I didn't expect that reaction.

"My dad and I used to play a lot," was all she said. I hugged her, as I lead her over to a different game.

"You ok with this one?" I asked. I looked at her face for any signs of disapproval. I knew she wouldn't though. We had played this a ton when we were little. Pac Man. Her face lit up as she stuck in the quarters. I was trying to focus on the screen but found myself looking at her face instead. I had always loved how she stuck out her tongue when she was trying to concentrate.

"Aww, man," She said as she looked at me. I realized this and snapped my head back to look at the screen.

"8,160. Not bad. I bet I can do better!" I put in the quarters required and played. My score only ended up being 8,000.

"You beat me again," I said giving her a high five. She smiled again, as I realized just how much I had missed it. After we played that, we headed for the snack bar, where Riley got a slushie and a hot dog. I guess she had her appetite back. I got the same as we headed for a table. We ate in silence for a minute or two, when Riley finally talked.

"Thanks," She looked at me and paused. "For everything. I really appreciate the support... but most of all, thanks for saving me." I looked at her dumbfounded. What did she mean I saved her? It was like she read my mind, "If it wasn't for you Ian... I probably would have killed myself last night. I know I overreacted, but I was just done." She looked down and took another bite of hot dog.

"Ready to go?" She asked after a minute. I snapped out of my trance.

"Yeah..." I said quietly. We went out to the car, and headed home.

**~Riley's POV~**

Going to the arcade with Ian was the most fun I had had in a long time. I reveled in how much it was like old times, not giving a care in the world. Being our normal childish selves. We drove home in silence, both tired from our adventure. I realized that the fun wouldn't last long, as I knew I was heading back into the real world, where I still had a funeral to plan for my parents. A funeral. That thought hit me hard, and I felt sick to my stomach. All of the sudden that hot dog and slushie weren't agreeing with me. I clutched my hands over my belly, willing myself not to get sick. I felt Ian's gaze turn to me, his blue eyes boring into me.

"Riley? You ok?" He glanced from the road, to me, then back at the road. I stared straight ahead, taking deep breaths.

"Yeah... I'm fine..." I lied through gritted teeth. I clutched my abdomen harder. _Don't throw up. Don't throw up. You'll be fine Riley. _I tried to sooth myself. I closed my eyes, and imagined us still at the arcade. Still having fun, and not having to worry about adult matters. It wasn't working. I clutched the door handle.

"Pull over," I whispered, keeping my eyes closed. Ian gave me a surprised look.

"What?" He said incredulously. I looked him in the eyes.

"I said... pull OVER!" I nearly screamed. He turned the wheel sharply into a driveway, as I pulled on the door handle. He sat dumbfounded as I climbed out, went to the nearest bush, and puked. I felt a tear escape my eye as I did it again, then sat on the ground, hugging my knees. I had lost my leg strength. Ian gained his composure enough to stumble out of the car and run to me.

"Riley!" He dropped to his knees next to me, rubbing his hand up and down my back.

"Riley, are you ok?" He asked softly.

"Just take me home," was all I managed to squeak out. I felt one arm go under my legs, the other supported my back. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he carried back to the car, both doors still swung wide open. He gently put me inside, buckled me up, and drove home.

I listened half awake to the conversation Ian was having with Anthony in the living room. Ian had put me back in his bed, with a dish pan just in case.

"I don't know, I guess she got food poisoning or something, she just had to puke all of a sudden." I heard Ian say quietly. He was trying his best not to let me hear.

"Should she go to the doctor? Ian, this could be serious, she could be really sick," Anthony said in a strained voice. As much as Anthony was a friend to me, that suggestion didn't sound like the best option for me.

"No, she had a hot dog at the arcade. That could be it." I was thankful Ian brought that up. It seemed like a good explanation.

"But you had one too dude, why aren't you sick?" Anthony was bringing up some good points as well.

"Maybe it was just hers." Anthony seemed to accept that fact, because I didn't hear a reply.

I was feeling weak. I hadn't eaten much the past few days, and what I did eat just came back up, like with the hot dog. Ian had put an apple on the bedside table, just in case I needed something to eat. I reached up and grabbed the apple, looking for a good first place to bite. I took out a chunk and chewed it with disinterest. I forced myself to swallow it. I knew I needed something in my stomach, no matter how small. I grabbed Ian's Pikachu plushie, and hugged it for comfort. I wasn't looking forward to the meeting with my grandparents tomorrow.

**~Ian's POV~**

Riley hadn't gotten up since we came home, and I was starting to worry about her. I was worried before, but now it was more prominent. Throughout the evening I heard some coughing, but when I checked the pan it was empty. That was a good sign... right? As the evening dragged on, I got more and more tired, thinking about the funeral, and what I needed to help Riley with. I was given the task of helping contact all of her close family members. And Riley had a lot of cousins.

I looked at the time to see it was only 9:00 PM. Most nights I stayed up later, but tonight was an exception. I trudged into my room, only to remember that Riley was sleeping in my bed. I checked the pan one last time, still finding it empty, and saw the apple had one bite taken out of it. At least she tried. I turned around to head back out to the couch, when I heard a quiet voice.

"Ian?" It was Riley. Was I really that loud?

"Yeah?" I asked softly. I walked closer so I could hear. I crouched down to her eye level.

"Stay with me?" This was the same question she asked me the other night. It was also the second time she asked me while half asleep. Whether her fully conscious self wanted it or not, I climbed over her into the bed, closing my eyes. I felt her move a little closer, curling up with my Pikachu plush. I couldn't help but smile.

I woke up from the daylight streaming in through the blinds. I perched myself up on one elbow to look at the clock. 9:00 AM, which meant Riley had to leave in about an hour and a half. I wondered if she would even be well enough. I gently shook her shoulder.

"Riley, it's 9 o'clock," I whispered. She opened her eyes and squinted from the sunlight. She sat up and rubbed her eyes, then looked back at me. She gave me a quizzical look.

"Did I ask you to stay again last night?" She asked in a groggy voice. She put her hand to her head and shook it, looking a little dazed.

"Yeah," I said looking down. She looked away, then stood up slowly. She toppled a bit, but regained her balance. I basically hopped off of the bed to stand by her and make sure she didn't fall.

"Are you sure you're ok to go?" I asked worriedly. She nodded slowly. She started walking to the kitchen.

"I just need some water and something to eat," She said softly. I brought her into the kitchen and sat her at the table, then grabbed a fresh apple and a small glass of water.

"That's it?" She asked disappointed. I looked at her like a mother looks at their child who won't eat their vegetables. She bit into the apple silently.

"You need to start off slow, you can't just eat a bunch right away. It will make you sick like yesterday," I said matter-of-factly. She didn't respond. I looked at her while she ate. She definitely wasn't herself anymore. Her already skinny body had grown skinnier within a matter of days. Her face was pale, and she looked overall terrible.

"Morning," I heard behind me. I looked to see a sleepy Anthony standing in the hall. "What's for breakfast?" He yawned.

"You'll have to make your own this morning," I said tiredly, as I walked into the kitchen for some cereal. Cap'n Crunch always made me feel better. Anthony looked let down, but he walked into the kitchen and made a bowl of Cocoa Puffs.

"Ian, would you..." Riley stuttered a bit, " Come with me today to the meeting? I don't wanna go by myself," She sounded like a little kid. My heart tore a little.

"Of course," I said, trying to sound happy. She smiled a little, but I could tell how much effort it took for her. She sighed.

"I'll go get ready then,"

**A/N: Ok, I really loved writing the fluff for this... If you enjoyed it then please review! :)**


	4. Reminders

**A/N: This is a really long chapter, so be prepared. Also, sorry if you notice any grammar or spelling mistakes, I wrote a lot of this late at night, so there might be some things I missed. Please review and Enjoy!**

**~Riley's POV~**

Ian was watching me more. As I walked to the bathroom to brush out my hair, I could feel him stare at the back of my head. I wished he would stop worrying. I tried my best not to act sick, but with my body not accepting food, it was hard to act healthy. I entered the bathroom, looking at myself in the mirror. I guess Ian did have reason to worry. I was getting skinny, and it had only been a couple of days. My cheeks were prominent and pale, and my shirt felt slightly baggy. I tried to ignore these facts, as I ran my brush through my tangled hair. _Who am I? _I asked myself. Definitely not the Riley I was three days ago. I felt a lurch in my stomach. _Not again._I sidestepped to the toilet, just as I felt my stomach empty. Luckily Ian was banging around the house, getting everything he needed to go to the meeting. He didn't hear me.

"Ready to go?" I hadn't noticed him peek into the doorway.

"Yeah," I said tiredly. Anthony came out of his room, all dressed for the day. He was probably going to do stuff with his girlfriend, Kalel.

"I'll see ya guys later," He said rushing past us. I could tell he was eager to get out of the House of Depression. I waved after him, not in the mood to say much.

"We better go," Ian said, turning his attention back to me. "It's almost 10 o'clock,"

I nodded, and followed him out to the car.

.~.

"Riley, we're here," I felt Ian nudge my shoulder. I guess I fell asleep on the 10 minute drive. I unbuckled my seatbelt, but made no move to open the door. Ian was already out of the car and coming around to open it for me. He silently opened the door and reached out his hand for me to take. He had always been a gentleman. I pulled myself out of the car, as my Grandma Smith came out to greet us.

"Hello sweetheart," She said as she kissed my cheek. She gave Ian a hug as well.

"We have a lot of work to do, so let's get going," She said. I wouldn't explain her mood as happy, but more of just coping with the situation very well.

We followed her inside, and I sat down on the couch, the various foods on the coffee table mocking me. Ian pulled out his computer to show the invitations he had made to my grandparents. They all complimented him on how they looked, and they went on to other matters. I personally wished that I could cope this well. No one seemed to have a care in the world, while my world was collapsing on top of me.

I heard my Grandma Davis say something, but I was too busy staring at the wall to notice. I felt an elbow hit my arm. I quickly turned my head to the left, to see Ian looking worriedly at me.

"She asked if you could help with the reception planning," Ian whispered. I nodded as I half listened to what my Grandma had to say. _I don't want to be here. _I thought. _I want this all to be over. I want my life to go back to normal._

"... and I was thinking we could just have a buffet table, and people could get what they want." My Grandma Davis looked at me expecting me to say something. _God, it's like they're planning a wedding. Just put them in the ground already. _I shocked myself with that thought. I realized I still hadn't answered my Grandmother.

"Sounds good," I managed to get out. I looked at Ian for help, and he gave me a reassuring smile. My head started to hurt from all the talking. I closed my eyes and took deep breaths, trying to calm my nerves.

"Sweetheart, do you want something to eat?" Grandma Davis asked. I nodded slowly, knowing I would regret it later. I took some grapes, and popped them into my mouth one at a time. I was tense. I couldn't relax. I wanted to get away from everything, not be there planning how we were going to put my parents 6 feet under.

.~.

Finally it was over at about 11 AM. I hugged everyone goodbye, and Ian helped me back into the car. We started driving away in silence.

"I'm still waiting for things to get better," I mumbled to Ian. He didn't say a word. Just stared straight ahead, not wanting to promise anything else.

**~Ian's POV~**

We made it home, without another word being uttered. Riley was right. I had promised it would get better. But she wasn't. I could tell her health was failing, and I longed to go get her help. I also didn't want to force her to do anything she didn't want. _Ian, you're being stupid, she needs help. _I told myself. I figured it was time to talk with her about it.

I helped her back into the house and into my room, where she had stayed the past couple of nights. I didn't want to force her to stay on the couch. She laid down on the bed, as I lifted the covers up over her, her eyes closing immediately.

"Riley?" I asked quietly. I had to go about this right. She mumbled in response.

"I...I think it's time that you go to a doctor. You aren't healthy," I said in a soft voice. Her eyes opened and looked at me pleadingly. She shook her head.

"No. No. You know I hate hospitals, I won't go," She snuggled her head deeper into the blankets.

"Please, Riley. I can't stand seeing you so weak, you have to go," I tried again. She shook her head once more.

It was no use. My only other option was to drag her out of bed and force her to go. But then she would hate me. I didn't have the guts to do it. I gave up and rubbed her back until her breathing deepened. I heard Anthony come in the door, and someone else was with him. I quietly left my room and shut the door.

"Hey," I said as I walked down the hall. I saw Kalel was standing next to him.

"Do you mind if she hangs here for a bit?" Anthony asked. I gave him a serious look.

"Can I talk with you for a sec?" I didn't wait for a response, I just grabbed his arm and dragged him to the kitchen.

"Hey man, let go of me!" He snapped his arm out of my grip. "What's wrong with you?"

"I don't know what to do, she won't go to the hospital. I tried to convince her to go and she won't," I ran my hand through my hair nervously. Somehow I was hoping Anthony had the answer to my problems.

"Why don't you just pick her up and take her, she can't do anything man, she's weak," He said quietly.

"I can't do that, I can't force her into it," I looked down, trying to keep the tears contained.

"When is the funeral?" He asked the out of context question casually. I stared at him.

"Tomorrow," I said. "The church is taking care of a lot, so they can have it quicker," I said still confused.

"Take her after the funeral tomorrow, you'll be driving her, she has no choice," He said softly.

"I told you I won't force her into it Anthony," I was getting frustrated. Didn't he get it?

"Do you want her to die instead?" He said a little too loudly. Kalel peaked into the kitchen.

"Ant, I can leave if this is a bad time," She said quietly. I looked away, trying to not let her see the tear running down my face. Anthony brought me to reality, which was Riley dieing if she didn't get help.

"I'm sorry, can we play video games some other time? I have stuff to deal with here," She nodded. They kissed before she went out the door.

I went back to the couch and sat thinking about life without Riley. I pulled my knees up to my chest, and hid my face. Anthony was right. It had to be tomorrow. I took deep breaths, trying to keep myself together. Anthony walked over and sat next to me, giving me one of our rare long hugs. All of a sudden I felt like I hadn't slept in months.

"Ian?" I barely heard her small voice from my room. I got up off the couch and shuffled to the door, opening it to see Riley sitting on the bed with the dish pan, retching. There was nothing I could do except sit on the bed, putting a comforting hand on her shoulder. I waited until her shoulders stopped lurching, then took the pan and cleaned it out. Anthony followed me as I walked back to my bedroom, setting the pan on the floor. I ignored him as I climbed over Riley into the bed, not waiting for her to ask me to.

"You alright, man?" He whispered. He had his hand resting on the doorknob, waiting for my response.

"Just tired," I mumbled. I heard the door creak shut, and the light disappeared. I felt Riley fidget, so I moved closer, wrapping my arm around her. I wasn't going to let her go for anything.

.~.

I woke up to Riley coughing. She was sitting up, holding the pan, dry heaving. I put my hand on her back, as I sat up as well, watching in agony. She was in pain, and I couldn't do anything. Her best friend and protector, sat there like an idiot not knowing what to do. I felt absolutely powerless.

"False alarm," She said glumly. She set the pan on the floor, letting herself fall back onto the bed. It was 10:00 PM. I was restless now, I had to get up and do something. I carefully climbed over her, and grabbed my laptop off the desk, as I heard Riley say something softly.

"Will you come back?" She asked. I told her the one promise I knew I could keep.

"Of course," I opened the door slowly, spilling light into the room. Apparently Anthony was still awake as well. I closed the door behind me.

"Hey man," Anthony whispered. He was sprawled on the couch, his laptop on his stomach. "Is Riley ok?" He asked.

"If by good you mean not throwing up, then yes," I said flatly. I sat in the armchair next to the couch, and opened up my laptop. I forgot I left YouTube open. I was about to close out when I saw the "Taking a Break" video was still up.

"You didn't delete it?" I asked pointing at my screen. Anthony looked at me with a confused face, then realized.

"Sorry! I completely forgot with all that happened," He said in a hushed voice.

"It's ok," I selected the video, and clicked delete. Now we wouldn't be reminded.

**~Riley's POV~**

I felt something strong going around my stomach, realizing it was Ian's arm. He kept his promise. I kept my eyes closed, not wanting to get up and see my parents being put in the ground today. We laid together for a few minutes, Ian still snoozing away. Anthony opened the door, walking to the side of the bed. I laid still, not wanting to talk to him. He reached over me to shake Ian awake.

"Ian," he whispered. "Time to get up," Ian groaned, taking his arm from around me, and shaking my shoulder instead.

"Riley, we have to get ready," I turned my head to look at him.

"Can I stay here?" I asked softly. I really didn't want to go. He took me in his arms and held me.

"I'm afraid not, you need to go," He helped me sit up, as he grabbed the dress my grandma bought for me. He held it out for me.

"Can you help me?" I asked awkwardly. I was too tired to try and maneuver into a dress by myself. Anthony took the cue and walked out. I slipped off the SMOSH shirt Ian lent me, leaving me in my bra and cami. I felt embarrassed, but I just kept my head down. Ian took the simple black dress off of it's hanger, and slipped it over my head. I stood up with some help as the dress fell down to my knees. I took off my jeans and laid them on the bed, leaving me standing in the sad dress. I lifted my head to see Ian looking at me sadly.

"Can you make it through?" He asked his voice breaking. I nodded slowly. I sat back on the bed looking away, while he quickly changed into his suit he used on rare occasions.

"Let's go fix that hair of yours," He tried to smile. He linked his arm in mine and helped me off of the bed. I felt horrible, he was doing everything for me, even doing my hair. That was something that no other guy would ever do. He brushed out my tangles, leaving my hair down. It looked so plain and straight. Looking at him in the mirror, I thought he looked more tired than I was. I knew that he had taken care of me, and had sleepless nights the past few days. I felt an indescribable gratitude towards him. He brushed out his own short hair, before walking me to the living room, and sitting me on the couch.

"Anthony, we have to go!" Ian shouted down the hall. Anthony rushed out in his own suit, heading to the door.

"Then let's go," He said calmly. Anthony opened the door to the garage, as he waited patiently for Ian to lead me out on my unstable legs. Ian sat me in the backseat, so I would be more comfortable. I saw a tear escape Ian's eye as he turned away. I don't think he was crying over my parents.

.~.

I looked out the window as we drove, seeing kids playing outside in the sun. I wanted to be them. So carefree, not having to deal with dead parents, or sickness. I saw parents playing with those kids, their lives not being taken from them. My face burned as the hot tears trailed down my face, as I let out a sob. Ian turned around from his place in the front seat, reaching to take my frail hand in his.

"Everything will be fine," He lied. I knew he couldn't own up to that.

.~.

We pulled up to the cemetery, cars lined up all down the road, waiting to see the pair of caskets disappear. We pulled up to an empty spot in the line of cars, and I saw my Grandma Smith walking towards us.

"Hello sweetie," She said sadly opening my door. Ian walked past her to nearly lift me out of the car and set my feet on the grass. We walked closer and close to the ring of people, and my heart beat faster and faster. The crowd parted, and I started to collapse. Ian caught me, trying his best to hold up my limp body. The lids were open, and I saw my parents pale and stoic faces. I screamed. I couldn't handle it.

"MOMMY! DADDY!" I felt myself scream at the top of my lungs. I was a little kid again, yearning for their love and affection. Everyone turned to look at me, but I didn't care. I willed myself to run to the caskets, using up all of the energy I had left. Ian ran the short distance after me, pulling me up off of the ground. They both held each others pictures, and a picture of me. Ian whipped me around, staring straight into my eyes.

"RILEY!" He screamed back at me. He was crying too. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw everyone look down or away, sparing themselves the sight of the screaming girl. I fell into Ian's arms, not able to argue.

**~Ian's POV~**

This was agonizing. She was in so much pain, no one could understand. Not even me. She was like an infant laying in their mother's arms, bawling their eyes out. Except, her mother wasn't here. I was. I laid my head on hers, tears soaking her hair. I finally lifted her up, turning her away from the caskets. I walked her back to the ring of people, who stared in disbelief. She clung to my jacket, as the Pastor walked into the middle of the circle. I could tell he was trying to forget what he just saw.

"It's ok Riley... I'm here, don't worry," I soothed. The pastor started to talk, but neither Riley nor I were listening. I was falling apart. I couldn't stand to see Riley cry. I hugged her skinny frame tighter, not letting her fall to the ground.

"We should not dwell on their deaths, but celebrate the lives they lived," The pastor said. "They are going home to the lord, our God. They are in no pain. They are happy and joyful, and are home," He made the inspirational speech. That was all I caught. I was trying to focus on Riley, and trying to make her feel happy and joyful. I knew it wasn't possible.

"Ian," she sobbed. "Why... why did this have to happen to me?" She whispered into my chest.

"I don't know," I had no straight answer. No one did.

All of a sudden, she went completely limp. She slipped from my arms, falling to the ground. Everyone stopped. I stood open mouthed, looking at her frail body. I fell to my knees.

"CALL 911!" I screamed. It was too late. I failed. I should've forced her to go to the hospital earlier. Tears fell faster and faster down my face, as I laid my head on her chest, listening for a heartbeat. It was there, but it was faint. Her breathing was shallow, and she was getting colder. I heard her Grandpa Davis on the phone, nearly screaming at the operator to send an ambulance. Anthony sat on the other side of her, unsure of what to do. I shook Riley's shoulders, trying to get her to stir. I got no response.

The ambulance arrived quickly, and several EMT's jumped out, carrying a stretcher. They lifted her gently onto it, wheeling her quickly to the van. I ran beside her.

"Are you a family member?" One EMT asked me. I shook my head violently.

"I'm her best friend, I have to come!" I nearly screamed.

"I'm sorry sir, only family members allowed, you'll have to follow behind," She said back to me. Grandpa Smith ran up behind me, telling the woman to let me go with them. She quickly agreed. I jumped in beside her, looking helplessly at Riley.

I was losing my best friend.


	5. Wake Up

**A/N: Ok, So this is definitely NOT my best chapter... but bear with me, and we will make it through together. XD**

**Two things: One, it was difficult to work with because I only had Ian's perspective. Two, I'm not a doctor. So please don't judge me on what the doctor says. Ok Enjoy!**

**~Ian's POV~**

I sat in horror, watching the EMT's work in the cramped space. One attached an oxygen mask to her thin face, another stuck a needle in her arm, fluids flowing from the bag they held. The woman that had talked to me earlier checked her pulse. I sat still, eyes wide looking at the sad figure of Riley. _I failed... She was counting on me. _I thought. _She's dying._

.~.

We finally arrived at the hospital, nurses rushing out to help. They lifted the stretcher out of the the ambulance. I tripped after them, trying to keep up. My feet didn't want to cooperate.

"Riley..." I started to sob again. They rushed the stretcher through the double doors, into the long hallway with the plain rooms. I felt someone grab me by the arm. It was Grandpa Davis. I watched as they rolled Riley away, turning down another hallway out of sight.

"Let me go!" I shouted. He gripped me harder, fighting against my pushes and shoves.

"You need to let the doctors do their work," He said too calmly. I looked at him in shock. How could he expect me to stay in the waiting room? I needed to be with her. I needed to see if she would be all right.

"No! She needs me!" I was screaming now. People stared at me in disbelieve. I didn't care. I tore my arm out of his grip, tearing through the doors. I ran as fast as I could down the hall, sliding around the corner where I last saw them turn. I heard Grandpa Davis coming after me, as I saw the end of her stretcher being brought into a room. I slid to a halt in front of the door. I was greeted with a mob of nurses all working around her, putting different IV's into her arms. A doctor rushed past me carrying a clipboard.

"Who are you?" he asked hurriedly. He shuffled through papers on a clipboard.

"I-Ian Hecox, I'm her best friend," I stuttered. "I knew I should have brought her earlier," I mumbled, as I fidgeted where I was standing. He looked at me sadly.

"We will try our hardest Mr. Hecox, but her condition is critical," He said calmly. "I need to know what's been happening the past couple of days," He said, just as Riley's Grandpa jogged up behind me.

"Ian, you have to leave them alone," He panted.

"I was actually asking Ian a few questions," the doctor explained to him.

I looked past him, seeing Riley connected to multiple things. A tear escaped my eye. I told him about her parents death, her depression, her stress. Her constant vomiting. He wrote all of this down quickly, nodding as I explained it to him.

"What going to happen? I-is she going to-," I got cut off.

"We'll do everything in our power, Mr. Hecox. I'll let you know when you can see her," He said to her grandpa. He gave a slight smile, turning to go into her room.

I plopped into the chair by the door, hiding my face in my hands. I wanted this all to be a nightmare. I wanted to wake up, with no more than a sweaty forehead. I wanted Riley to come over to play video games, us acting like little kids. But I knew it was real. It was happening. I felt a hand on my shoulder, looking up to see Grandpa Davis.

"We need to go back," He said softly. "You can see her later,"

I knew he was right. The doctors needed to be able to work to try and save her. Part of my mind still wanted to linger, and be with her. I got up anyway and headed back out to the waiting room.

.~.

I felt myself staring at the wall, unable to do much else. I heard restless children, magazines being flipped through, and the quiet chatter on the TV.

"Are you Riley Smith's family?" I snapped out of my one sided staring contest to see the doctor walking towards us.

"Yes," I heard all of the grandparents answer. He introduced himself as Dr. Polen. He sat down in one of the chairs across from us, with his hands folded. He looked at each of us before continuing.

"Well, I've talked with the psychiatric doctor here, and he helped me determine what happened to her body. From what you told me," He pointed at me, "she has PTSD, or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and that resulted in malnutrition from the stress." He paused. "The anxiety and trauma that she has experienced put a lot of stress on her mental health, thus impacting her physical state as well. That stress repeatedly induced vomiting. She became the way she is now so quickly, because her body mass is so small, that she didn't have much on her to keep her going without food," He looked at us for any signs of confusion. Seeing none, he continued. "On top of all of that, she is in a comatose state. We don't know how long that will last, but we're hoping no more than a couple of days, to a week," He paused again. "You can come back and see her now, if you'd like," He stood up, waiting for us to follow his lead.

We followed him back to her room, seeing that all the nurses had left. The only sound I heard was her heart monitor and her quiet breathing. I took a step into the blank white room, wanting to run to her.

"I'm going to take care of some other patients, but I'll be back," He smiled as he walked into another room.

I walked to the side of her bed, pulling up a chair as I did so. She was so still. I ignored the fact that her grandparents were behind me, as I took her hand in mine. It was lifeless. I heard Grandma Davis whisper something to the others.

"Ian, sweetie," She said softly. "We'll be outside the room if you need us," I looked up to see her smile, as she led the others out of the room. I felt guilty, she was their granddaughter, they should be able to see her too. I couldn't make myself move to go get them. My feet stayed planted where they were.

I let go of her hand, instead sitting there just looking at her stoic face. I layed my head in my hands once again, feeling my shoulders start to tremble.

"I'm so sorry Riley," I mumbled. "Please come back to me," I begged. I lifted my head, still seeing her in the same position. I stood up and leaned over her, planting my lips on her forehead. One of my tears landed in her tangled hair. Maybe it was just me, but I thought I heard the beeping of the monitor get faster. I sat back down grabbing her hand once more. The beeping went back to normal.

.~.

I sat for hours, one of the grandparents coming in to sit with me every once in awhile. They were so kind to me, they always had been. We talked about unimportant things, which returned me to a sense of normalcy. At least for a little bit. It got to about 11 PM, when they decided to call it a night. Riley was stable, and they had already gone to get overnight bags, including some things for me. They were going to stay at the hotel across the street.

"One of us should probably stay with Riley," Grandma Smith suggested. "Just in case something happens," I waited for one of them to volunteer, but they all looked my way. I stood dumbfounded.

"No. One of you should stay, you're her family," I said. I wasn't lying about that. Riley should wake up to one of them. If she woke up at all.

Grandma Davis walked closer to me, staring into my eyes. "Young man," She paused before continuing, "We all know how much you love her. We can see it, we've talked about it. And we also know how much she loves you. It's obvious!" She put her hand on my cheek, looking at me through her aged eyes. "Stay with her. I know you want to. Please do this one thing for this old lady," She chuckled lightly. They all smiled at her speech.

I paused, looking at all of them, making sure they all agreed.

"Ok, I'll make sure to call if anything happens," I hugged them all, feeling like I was their grandson. I watched as they walked down the hall to the lobby, waving behind them as they disappeared. I turned back into the room, encouraged that the heart monitor was still going at a steady pace. I sat back in the chair, my eyes drooping from exhaustion.

.~.

I heard soft footsteps as I opened my eyes. A nurse was walking around the room checking Riley's various machines and fluids. She saw me and stopped what she was doing.

"Oh, I'm sorry sir, I didn't mean to wake you," She whispered, moving around once again.

I rubbed my eyes and looked at Riley, to see she looked the same.

"How is she?" I asked groggily. I sat up a little more to wake myself up.

"She's doing fine. She gave us quite a scare last night, but I think she will recover. It's gonna take a while," She shuffled back around the bed towards me.

"Excuse me," She said kindly. She leaned over my shoulder to look at some numbers on the machine behind me. She wrote them down on a clipboard. As she leaned back, I saw her nametag said "Melanie".

"I'm Ian by the way," I stuck my hand out, and she shook it lightly.

"Melanie," She said pointing at her nametag. She smiled and turned to walk out of the room. "I'll be the one checking up on her, so I'll see you later," She walked out of the room quickly, probably going to check on other people.

I turned to Riley, seeing her chest rise and fall. I stood up and gave her a quick kiss on her forehead again. It made me sad that she would never know about these little kisses I gave her, that I would have to act like they didn't happen when she woke up. I heard my stomach grumble. I realized I hadn't eaten since yesterday morning.

"I'll be right back," I said to her. In reality, I knew I was talking to myself. I started walking down the hall to the cafeteria, when I saw her grandparents walking towards me.

"How is she?" They asked the same question I had.

"She's fine. They said she'll recover but it will take a while," I said remembering what Melanie told me. They continued on to the room as I kept walking to the food.

After a few minutes of looking, I found it. I was greeted by the smell of toast and baked goods. I walked to the food line, which was pretty much empty, except for a few tired looking people. I picked up a cinnamon roll, an apple, and a glass of chocolate milk. I scanned the room for an empty table.

"Ian!" I heard someone say. I turned to the left to see Melanie sitting by herself. I guess she was hungry too. I walked over and sat down across from her, taking a bite out of my apple.

"Long time no see," she joked. She acted like we had been friends for a long time.

"Yeah," I chuckled. I continued eating, not in the mood to talk much.

"What are you humming?" She looked at me while chewing a bite of her toast. I must of looked confused because she giggled. "I thought I heard you humming something,"

I hadn't realized it. I was humming one of Riley's favorite songs.

"Uh... It's 'Country Song' by Seether," I answered quietly.

"I love that song!" She said enthusiastically. "Do you listen to a lot of their music?" she asked, genuinely interested.

"Not really. Riley does though," I said, remembering how Riley would walk around singing and dancing to their music.

She nodded, and continued to eat, smiling sadly.

"How long have you two been friends?" She asked looking up from her tray.

"Since 5th grade. We started talking over video games we had played," I said smiling slightly.

She nodded. "She's lucky to have a friend like you," She ate some more, and we sat not saying a word.

After a few minutes, her pager beeped.

"Oh shoot!" she whispered. "Sorry, my break is over, I have to go back," She gathered up her trash, and hurried out. It was nice being able to talk with someone other than Riley's grandparents.

.~.

I walked back to the room, greeted by the four familiar faces. They all sat around Riley in the spacious room. A different nurse was checking on Riley.

"Hey," I said quietly. Even though she was in a coma, I felt like I would wake Riley if I talked too loud.

"Hello sweetie!" Grandma Davis greeted me, pulling a chair closer to her, patting the seat. I sat down throwing a glance over at the still body in the hospital bed. "Nothing new," she said following my gaze.

I nodded. I knew nothing would happen for a while, but I still hoped for something. Some kind of response from her. The stillness was killing me. And I was afraid it was killing her too.

.~.

Two days had passed, and there was still nothing from Riley. I still stayed at the hospital, wanting to be there when she woke up. And everyday, Melanie would check on her, making small talk along the way with me.

"Hey Ian," Melanie said casually as she walked in. I looked up from the magazine I was skimming through, to see her start doing the same routine. She checked Riley's fluids, then her heart monitor, and then the various other machines I didn't know.

"Hey," I replied. I had forgotten I was holding Riley's hand.

"Excuse me," Melanie said shyly, as I let go of her hand, letting Melanie pass through to look at another machine. She passed back through, as I grabbed Riley's limp hand once again.

"Well... I'll see you later," Melanie said as she walked out of the room. But she quickly came back. "Would you want to... um... go get a coffee sometime?" She said swiftly.

I sat still in my chair, unsure of what to say.

"Never mind, that was stupid. Are you two...?" She gestured to our linked hands.

"No... No, at least not right now," I felt my face flush red. I didn't mean to make her feel awkward. "Maybe some other time,"

"What?" She looked confused.

"The coffee, maybe some other time," I said smiling.

"Okay," she smiled back. She left again, leaving for sure this time.

.~.

I woke up, my back sore from being slouched in the chair. I stood up and bent backwards to crack it, just as Melanie came in.

"Looks like you slept well," she joked. She wasn't wearing her scrubs anymore, instead she was wearing a simple t-shirt and jeans. "I just thought I should check on you before I leave, you seemed pretty down,"

"Thanks," I said hesitantly. We had only known each other for a few days. How could she know when I was feeling down? "Wanna go for that coffee? I need to get out of here for a bit," The hospital was starting to get to me.

"It's 10 at night, Ian. Isn't it a little late for coffee?" She giggled.

"We can get decaf, I just need to leave. I'll buy," I offered.

"Okay, if you wanna," she said.

We walked to the McDonalds down the street. Luckily the dining area was still open. We each ordered a small decaf coffee, and sat down at a somewhat clean table.

"You really like her, don't you?" She suddenly asked. She didn't look at me, but sat swirling the coffee around in her cup.

I paused. "Yeah. She's absolutely beautiful and funny; she makes me happy," I trailed off. "Sorry, I got a little carried away," I laughed nervously.

"No. It's ok, I can tell. I was going to actually ask you to a movie or something this morning. But I saw you with her last night, and I decided against it. I thought a cup of coffee was more appropriate. You know, you two have something special going on," She smiled. "I don't want to get into the middle of that,"

"It's just nice to have someone to talk to," I said quietly. "Other than her grandparents," I took a sip of my coffee as I thought about all that's happened the past few days.

"I'm glad I can be that person," she smiled. We continued talking about our interests, our lives, where we grew up, etc. It was nice to have a normal conversation, that wasn't centered around recent events.

"We should probably head back," she finally said. "I need to get home, and you should go back to Riley,"

I nodded, as we got up and left the building, tossing our cups in the trash bin. We walked back in the crisp night air, the hospital slowly becoming bigger. I gave her a small hug as we got to the employee parking lot.

"Thanks for just talking with me," I said gratefully. "I've needed that for a while," She hugged me back.

"No problem," she smiled. "If you ever need to talk, just call the hospital and ask for me. I'll always answer,"

She walked to her car, and I waved as she drove away. I walked back through the hospital doors. The reception desk lady greeted me as I passed her. When I got to Riley's room, the grandparents were there again.

"What's up?" I asked. They told me nothing had happened. Just as I expected. Grandma Davis pulled a chair up between her and Riley's bed, patting the seat as she did the other night. I sat down, absentmindedly grabbing Riley's hand, giving it a slight squeeze. I felt her squeeze back. Was I imagining it?

I sat up in surprise, squeezing her hand again. She gripped my hand harder. I nearly shouted for joy, but my voice would hardly work. I reached over to Grandma Davis.

"She... she squeezed my hand," I stuttered. I gave her Riley's hand, and she gave it a try. Sure enough, Riley's hand moved. I looked at Riley's face, to see it have the same stoic look. I jumped up, and went to find a nurse. I saw one that had checked on her before, and nearly ran over and grabbed them by the wrist.

"She's responding to my hand, she squeezed my hand!" I nearly shouted. They quickly walked back to her room, going to see if it was true. They performed the same small test. She gave their hand a small amount of pressure. She was coming back.

Riley was waking up.

**Update: Sorry It's taking so long for the next chapter! I have had writers block, but I FINALLY got over it. The next chapter is almost done now, so expect an update soon! 3**


	6. You and I

**A/N: Sorry this took so long. I had a terrible case of writer's block, and lack of motivation. Please forgive me! Also sorry if this is not the quality I have as usual, or something else you notice is not up to par. :P Enjoy!**

**~Ian's POV~**

"I'll go find Dr. Polen," the nurse said hurriedly. She sped out of the room and down the hall to start her search.

"She's waking up," I said in disbelief. I would finally be able to talk with her, hug her, tell her I loved her. I thought about that last one. Was I ready to admit it?

Dr. Polen walked in quickly, walking straight to Riley. The nurse that found him followed after, observing over his shoulder. The doctor lifted up one of her eyelids, shining a small light into it. He grabbed her hand, doing the same test we had all performed.

"Well, you were right. She's starting to regain consciousness," He tried a few other things, testing her body's reactions, finally turning to all of us. "A couple of things. When she does wake up, she's going to be confused, so be patient with her. And another, she might black out a couple more times, but it shouldn't be detrimental. I have dealt with this before, so I'm just telling you what I've witnessed,"

"How long will it take?" I asked eagerly. I wanted to see her lively again.

"It shouldn't be too much longer," He turned to the nurse. "Keep an eye on her vitals, I'll be right back," He walked out of the room.

I sat back in the chair next to the bed, willing Riley to wake up faster. I pulled my phone out of my pocket, and dialed Anthony's number. He had tried to visit Riley, but he hated the hospital atmosphere. He hadn't been there since the day after she entered the hospital. But he needed to know that she was waking, he should be here too.

"Hello?" he answered.

"Anthony, it's happening. She's waking up!" I exclaimed. I couldn't hide my joy. My hand was shaking.

"Ok, I'll be there in a few," He sounded excited too. I stuck my phone back into my pocket.

I felt a hand grip my shoulder, and instantly knew it was one of the grandparents. I had almost forgot they were there out of pure excitement.

"Oh, this is wonderful!" I heard Grandma Smith exclaim. The rest of them agreed as we watched the nurse looking at the heart monitor, the machine beeping stronger than ever before.

**.~.**

A few minutes later Anthony slid into the room, eyes wide with anticipation. He stood next to the bed, and smiled down at me. Anthony had known Riley just as long as I had. He didn't always show it, but he had a special place for her in his heart beside his girlfriend Kalel.

"How much longer will it take?" Anthony asked softly. He looked at me expecting an answer.

"Not too much longer," we heard from the doorway. Dr. Polen strode in. "Her vitals are getting very strong, so it should be a matter of minutes," He looked at Riley and smiled. I followed his gaze to Riley's body. "I stand corrected,"

My heart skipped a beat, as I saw her eyes flutter open, then close. She moaned a little and her eyes opened for another split second before closing again. Dr. Polen walked over to her.

"Riley, can you hear me?" He asked sweetly. He grabbed her hand and she squeezed it tightly, letting him know she could. "Good. Can you open your eyes for us?" She opened her eyes tiredly, looking dazed. "Great job sweetie, now can you turn your head to me?" She looked like she had no clue what was going on, but she obeyed. I caught her eye for a second, and I saw her lips turn up slightly. "She appears to be waking up alright, it's just going to take a few minutes. For the time being, just talk with her like you would normally," He passed her hand off to me, and I absentmindedly stroked the back of it with my thumb. She mimicked my action.

"Hey there," I whispered. Her mouth opened forming the word "hello", but no sound came out. Her gaze turned to all of her grandparents and Anthony, as they stared back at her. They all beamed at her small attempts to smile.

Dr. Polen took the bed controls, pressing the button that made the bed bend upwards. Nurses helped Riley assume the sitting up position, leaning her back against the bed. Her lips moved, trying to say something.

"Water," she said in a small whisper. A nurse ran off to grab the drink she requested, coming back a minute later, along with some saltine crackers. She needed something easy to digest. Riley gripped the styrofoam cup gratefully, taking small sips. She intermittently ate the crackers hungrily along with the water. It was almost a whole new thing seeing Riley move again. It seemed like it had been forever. She had just been a limp body laying in a hospital bed, and now she was sitting up and moving right in front of me. I couldn't help but smile.

She handed me the cup and crackers which I set on the small table next to me. She leaned her head on the back of the bed, just looking at all of our faces. She kept a tight grip on my hand. She didn't move much otherwise. Lifting her arms to drink from the cup must have used up all of the strength she had, if any.

"What happened?" She finally asked softly. I sat silently, not wanting to overwhelm her.

"You passed out. You hadn't been eating. Do you remember?" I asked. She nodded slowly, deep in thought. Then she asked the question I had been dreading.

"How long was I out?" She looked at me expectantly, then at the others searching for a reply.

"About six days," I said quickly. Her eyes got wide, then went back to normal, taking in that information.

"Six days," she repeated. "It seemed like such a short time," She turned her head back towards the ceiling. She stared for a while, before turning back to look at the grandparents, Anthony, and the doctor. "Would you mind if I talked to Ian alone for a few minutes?" She asked in her tiny tired voice. They all looked at each other in silence, before exiting the room. I looked at her waiting for her to say something. She just looked at me for a straight minute before talking.

"I missed you," she whimpered.

**~Riley's POV~**

I went in and out of complete unconsciousness. I only heard bits and pieces of conversations, and felt when people touched me only half the time. I heard some of what the doctor had to say, what Ian said to that nurse Melanie, and what my Grandparents talked about. I had sometimes felt Ian holding my hand, but I couldn't move any muscles to hold his hand back. But what killed me the most was Ian's kisses. I wanted so badly to kiss him back, to hold his face in my hands, and tell him how I felt. _Move, Riley, move! _I kept yelling at myself inside my head. But nothing would work. When he walked away I tried to reach out and grab his arm but I couldn't. I was just a brain sitting inside of a lifeless body.

.~.

I could feel myself gaining more control. Ian was holding my hand, so I gave it a tight squeeze. I heard him nearly yelling for the nurse, telling them I was waking up. A few minutes later I was able to force my eyes open, to reveal to blurry hospital room, and a doctor standing over me.

"Great job sweetie, now can you turn your head to me?" He asked. I turned my head to the blurry figure, seeing him smile. "She appears to be waking up alright, it's just going to take some time. For the time being, just talk with her like you would normally," He told my family. I felt my hand get transferred to the familiar comfort of Ian's, feeling him rub his thumb on the back of my hand. I did the same. I wanted him to know I was alright. I struggled to say hello, finding my voice as silent as a ghost.

"Water," I managed to choke out. I saw a nurse rush out of the room and come back with a styrofoam cup. _She couldn't have bothered to get a straw? _I wondered. I was too eager for the water to care much more, so I forced my arms to hold the cup to my parched lips. I felt the cool liquid slide down my throat. The nurse also brought a row of saltine crackers, which I ate greedily.

"What happened?" I said much easier this time. Ian set my water and crackers on the table, then looked back at me sadly.

"You passed out. You hadn't been eating. Do you remember?" He asked. I nodded. I definitely remember those parts. The constant torture of an empty stomach had finally gotten to me, and I passed out at the funeral.

"How long was I out?" I saw Ian's face drop as I asked this question. I hadn't realized how much I had missed his sweet face, whether happy or sad.

"About six days," he said swiftly, looking down at his shoes.

I didn't think it had been that long. I felt my eyes get wide, but I quickly brought them back to normal.

"It seemed like such a short time," I brushed off the anxiety I felt for what I put my family through. I turned to everyone else standing in the room, which I was surprised to see included Anthony.

"Would you mind if I talked to Ian alone for a few minutes?" I asked casually. It took a minute, but they finally all walked out. I gave Anthony a reassuring smile as he left. I looked back to Ian, just taking in his features.

I soon felt my emotional wall break. It was just Ian and I in the room, I didn't have to hide anything from him.

"I missed you," I felt the tears start to fall as he grabbed me in a tight hug over the bed railing. I instantly felt better with his strong arms around my tiny body.

"You were asleep the whole time," he joked. He didn't release our embrace.

"It doesn't mean I didn't feel anything," I said into his shoulder. He rubbed my back soothingly, trying to calm me down. It worked. Just being with him made me happy. It always had and always will.

"I missed you too," He said quietly, breathing into my neck. His tone had turned more serious and loving. He lowered the bed railing so he could sit with me, then held me close, leaning his head on mine. I felt a tear drop onto my head. I tilted my head up to see his eyes red and puffy. I lifted my hand to wipe away a stray tear, as he stared at me with those perfect blue eyes.

"God, I missed you," he said again, his voice breaking. He hugged me tight again. I didn't want him to ever let go. He put his hands on my shoulders, holding me at arms length. He brought both hands up onto my cheeks, using his thumbs to wipe away the wetness under my eyes. I felt myself wanting to just ask him the question that had been burning in my mind for so long. I mustered up the courage, and looked straight into his eyes, forcing out my words.

"Ian," my heart pounded. I didn't know what to expect. Horrible thoughts ran through my head. _Will he reject me? Is he going to shoot me down and leave me forever? _I took deep breaths. "Do you love me?" I whispered slowly. I stared into the blue orbs, waiting for a sign of acceptance or rejection. His face was stoic, but his hand ran down the back of my head, staring back at me. I felt my chest rise and fall heavily, nearly hyperventilating.

"Riley Smith," He said softly. He seemed nervous too. At least I wasn't alone. "I've loved you since the day I met you. It sounds corny, but it's true. I never thought you liked me back," He held our stare. "You really love me?" He asked like a little boy.

I nodded. I had never been more sure about anything in my entire life. He gave me a relieved smile, as he looked down at me. I looked away shyly. For some reason, I was embarrassed. I had never had a guy look at me the way he did. With so much love and protection, all happening at once. It felt nice. His hand guided my face to look back at his eyes, as he moved his face an inch closer. My heart felt like it was about to burst out of my chest. We were both silent, not wanting to ruin a thing. Our lips finally collided, and I let out the breath I had apparently been holding. I felt him smile against the kiss. He was happy, and I was happy. That's all that mattered at that moment. Just us together at last.

We disconnected from the kiss, our foreheads leaning against each other. Ian hugged me again, except this time he did it wholeheartedly. Before it felt like he was holding back, but this time he was putting his all into it. He was putting every bit of his love into it. I was pulled completely onto his lap. He rocked me back and forth, like a child being cradled by their parent.

"Stay with me?" I smiled as I asked the familiar question.

"Always," He whispered. Ian leaned me back on the bed, putting the bed back to its original position. He laid beside me, while I curled inwards towards his chest, my hand on his heart. It's steady beat lulled me into the calmest state I had ever been in. His arms wrapped protectively around my body, fitting my head under his chin. I closed my eyes, focusing on his breathing and heartbeat. I felt his lips connect with my forehead, his short beard tickling my skin. I soon fell asleep, happy that we were finally together.

**~Ian's POV~**

I couldn't believe it. I had just kissed Riley. It played over and over again in my head. My heart felt like it would explode from happiness, and I felt like I couldn't love anything more than I loved her. She was amazing, beautiful, funny, and no one could take her from me. I held her tight as I felt her breathing deepen. She curled closer to my chest, and I felt her shiver a little. I realized the blanket had moved to the end of the bed, and she was completely exposed to the cold hospital room. I slowly reached down, trying not to disturb the sleeping girl next to me. I lifted the blankets over both of us, holding in our body heat. I heard the door open a little bit. I looked up to see the grandparents and Anthony standing at the door, peeking in. I gave them a small smile.

"Finally," I heard Anthony whisper as he closed the door again. The grandmas giggled at his comment.

I slowly drifted to sleep. I was finally at complete peace. Riley was going to be ok.

.~.

I woke up to the sound of someone's soft footsteps. Dazed, I lifted my head finding Riley still in my arms. At least it wasn't just a dream. I looked towards the door to see the whole family, including Anthony, padding into the mid-sized room.

"How is she?" Grandpa Smith whispered. We were all aware of the still sleeping girl next to me.

"She'll be fine," I whispered back. I lightly nudged Riley's small figure, and her eyes fluttered open. I knew she would want to see them. Her face grew excited as she saw her Grandparents standing before her.

"Hey guys," she said groggily. She got a hug from everyone, and they started talking about what had gone on while she was comatose. A sudden look of realization hit her face.

"What happened to the funeral?" She looked around for her answer.

"The rest of the family took care of it. The service was finished, just not with everyone there," Grandma Davis said sadly. She took Riley's hand as she processed what was being said.

"I want to go see them," She said suddenly. "Is there any way for me to go out?"

I wanted so badly to whisk her out of the hospital, away from it forever so she could properly say goodbye to her parents. But I knew that was impossible. The doctor said she needed to stay in this dreadful place.

"I'm sorry Riley, but the doctors need to keep you here for a while so you can get better," Grandpa Davis answered. She looked sad, but I could tell she understood. She would need physical therapy to help get her strength back up, and her diet needed to be watched.

Just then, Melanie walked in carrying a small tray of food. There wasn't much. Just water, a small bowl of oatmeal, and some more saltine crackers. Easily digestible things.

"Good morning everyone," she said cheerfully as she set the tray on the rolling bedside table. Everyone responded just as happily. She stuck her hand out to Riley in greeting.

"My name's Melanie. I've been your main nurse these past few days. Ian's told me so much about you!" Riley shook her hand lightly.

"Nice to meet you," Riley said meekly.

"It's nice to finally meet you too," She smiled while she moved the food closer to Riley's side. "I brought you breakfast. I didn't know if you were hungry or not, but I had to offer you something,"

Riley took the crackers, and slowly started to eat them one by one. Melanie made small talk while she ate, trying to keep it from being too silent. I suddenly noticed Riley had stopped eating.

"Are you ok?" I asked softly. She nodded.

"I feel bad, you guys haven't eaten anything, and you must be starving. You should go get yourself some food," She said guiltily.

"Are you sure?" I didn't want to leave her alone, she had just come back to us. She nodded, and I had to respect her wishes. I stood up, leaned over her and kissed her soft forehead. I felt myself blush as she smiled at me. I hoped that smile would never go away. "We'll be back as soon as we can," I motioned for the grandparents and Anthony to follow. We walked slowly to the cafeteria, eyeing the artwork on the walls as we passed.

"So," Anthony said slowly. I hadn't noticed that he had walked up next to me. "You and Riley, huh?" he said playfully. He gave me a small nudge with his elbow. I smiled and nodded. "I'm happy for you, buddy," he whispered. "It's about time you two got together. Ah, here we are," He pointed to the big sign hanging in the hall that read "Cafeteria."

We all got our various food, and sat down at a big round table. We ate and talked about Riley and how she seemed better already. She seemed to have her glow back, her life was back in her body. I couldn't make myself pay attention to the rest of the conversation. My mind was still stuck on what had happened last night, and what Riley and I had become. We were together, we were boyfriend and girlfriend. I hoped. _Maybe she's still out of it. _I wondered. _Maybe she didn't mean any of it. _My mind was so filled with doubt, I hated it. I wish I enjoyed what had happened like a normal human being.

"Ian," I heard Grandma Davis say. "I'm guessing you were planning on being with Riley all day?"

"Uh, yeah," I said snapping out of my daze. I ate the rest of what was on my tray, not saying another word.

.~.

"I love that show!"

We were just about back to Riley's room when I heard Melanie's voice. I turned the corner into the room to see Melanie sitting in the chair next to Riley's bed, chatting away.

"Oh hey, I was just on my first break," She got up from the chair I had spent most of my time in.

"We were just talking, and it turns out we like a lot of the same stuff," Melanie smiled. "Interesting, huh?" She excused herself from the room going to return to work.

Riley smiled, her green eyes locking onto me.

"How was breakfast?" She hugged me as everyone sat in the various chairs about the room.

"Good," I said softly.

"The doctor came to see me, he said my first physical therapy session is in about half an hour. Can you take me down there?" She asked holding my hand.

"Yeah, let's get going so you don't have to hurry," I noticed a wheelchair had already been brought in. I walked over to retrieve it, turning to see Riley swinging her legs over the side of the bed.

"Don't get up too fast sweetie," Her grandma Smith warned. Riley nodded, sitting patiently.

"Could you guys leave for a second? I need to get dressed," She said shyly. We all nodded. I turned to leave, but felt a small hand grab my wrist. "Can you get my clothes out of the bag?" she blushed. I felt myself do the same.

The rest of them left the room, closing the door behind them. I hadn't realized how sick she looked in the hospital gown. She looked so fragile and vulnerable. It broke my heart to see her that way. I went over to the duffel bag that held her clean clothes. The grandparents had brought them with when they got their own things. I pulled out her sweatpants and her favorite Seether t-shirt. I looked away as she slipped off the gown, and replaced it with the shirt. She put on the sweatpants, then sat there tiredly.

"You ok?" I rolled up the wheelchair closer to the bed, ready to transfer her into it. She nodded slowly.

"Just tired,"

I got ready to lift her completely off of the bed and into the chair, but she stopped me.

"I can do it," She lifted herself slowly off the bed, and stood on wobbly legs. She walked the few steps to the wheelchair, and sank down into it. I stood behind her the whole time, arms posed to catch her if she fell. She sighed. "Let's do this thing,"

**AHHH I'm so sorry guys, I haven't been writing like I should. I've been busy, and I lack motivation. I will try my best to finish the next chapter ASAP! I haven't forgotten this, I promise!**


	7. Imperfections

**A/N: Ok. First things first. This chapter will be short, just because it has been so long, I felt like you guys deserved something. I had a huge lack of motivation to keep the story going, but somehow I worked through it. Secondly, I refer to a song that is very important. Mainly because I based the story off of it. It's called "Please Don't go" by Barcelona. Here is a link to the song on YouTube: watch?v=COqx-TCxrSk**

**Also, there is something in here that I have been dealing with myself. It's anxiety that is linked with crowds and noise, and I felt like I wanted to attempt and write down what it feels like. So just know that it is completely real. **

**One more thing, I PROMISE! Thanks to Tospringe, kiwipixel77, areyoureadingthis, and a guest for reviewing! You guys are awesome! Now with this long author's note, ENJOY!**

**~Riley's POV~**

I was proud for my small victory of walking by myself. It felt good to stand, but I also felt very weak. It was hard to keep myself up, and I put all of my energy into it. I felt the wheelchair start to move forward. We moved out of the room and down the hall to the two elevators standing next to one another. Ian walked out from behind me to push the button, and we waited. He gave a cute and dopey smile as he walked back behind the chair. His smile would kill me someday. The elevator dinged a few seconds later, it's doors opening into the small square space. He rolled me inside.

"Which floor did he say it was on?" He asked, his brow furrowed.

"Floor 6," I replied. He pushed the button, and the doors closed.

"Do you want me to stay for the session, or go somewhere else?" He looked into my eyes for an answer. I could tell he wanted the first option.

"Stay, if the therapist doesn't mind," I took his hand. It was kind of funny how protective he seemed. He just wanted to be with me, and I didn't mind.

The elevator dinged again, indicating the sixth floor on the numbers above the door. The chair slowly rolled out of the small room. Ian stared at the sign, looking for the way to the "Physical Therapy" section. He found what he was looking for, and we were on our way down the nearly empty hall.

"How much did you eat this morning?" He asked softly. Even with his light voice, the sound echoed through the hall.

"I ate about half the oatmeal, and some of the crackers," We continued leisurely down the hall. "I also drank a glass of water," I added.

"Well at least you're keeping it down," He said in his same soft tone. I nodded. We arrived at the waiting area which was, not surprisingly, empty.

"Is there an appointment for Riley Smith?" Ian asked kindly to the secretary. She smiled, and clicked a few things on her computer.

"Why, yes there is," she said sweetly. Her demeanor reminded me of my mother. I was amazed that I didn't feel the need to cry anymore. But I still felt the sorrow for her memory. She directed us through the door next to her office. Ian pressed the button for the automatic door, which swung open slowly. On the other side was a short, stout woman. Her slightly messy hair draped around her shoulders.

"Hello, I'm Dr. Foreman. You can call me Becky," She said. She stuck her hand out to both Ian and I, and we introduced ourselves. "The area we'll be working in is right back here,"

We followed her back to a room with various machines, weight balls, therapy bands, and many other objects that I didn't know.

"Do you mind if I stay?" Ian asked hesitantly.

"Oh, not at all!" Becky said sweetly. "Ok, Riley. I think we will start out with some very simple things. We don't want to stress your body out too much. How about we start out with getting you out of that chair?"

I nodded reluctantly. Ian locked the wheels in place, as I placed my hands on the arms of the chair. I pushed up and out of the chair; my legs felt slightly shaky beneath me. Becky held my hand to steady me, and I felt Ian's hand brush my waist, waiting again to catch me if I fell.

"Good, good!" Becky said excitedly. "Now let's just walk a few steps forward, and see how you're doing,"

I followed her order, and walked a few steps forward. It felt so strange to walk after laying in a bed motionless for a week. And with not much food in my system either. My legs ached a little, but not so much that I had to stop. She had me walk in a circle back to the chair. I gratefully plopped myself into it. Ian gave me a congratulatory squeeze of my shoulder.

"Well, that was good! Believe it or not that was progress, and any progress is great," She spoke with such happiness, I couldn't help but feel some myself.

For the rest of the session, I did stretches, and some sitting leg exercises. It felt so good to move again.

.~.

"Thanks!" Ian and I both called over our shoulders. She waved to us as we turned the corner to go back to the room.

"She was nice," Ian mused. "So how long do you have to go to therapy for?"

"Dr. Polen said it should only be a few days," I turned my head slightly to look at his face. He smiled down at me.

"Good," he said. We made our way back down the elevator, and down to the recovery hallway. We turned into my room, and I was happy to see the bed again. I sighed as he lifted me onto it, handing me the hospital gown. I quickly changed back into it, handing him my clothes. I watched as he stuck them in the bag, then pulled something else out. It was my iPod.

"I thought maybe you might want it. The music might make you feel better," He handed it to me, and when I clicked the home button I smiled right away. It was the picture of Ian and I from my 20th birthday. He was smiling sweetly at the camera, but behind my head, two fingers could be seen making bunny ears. I was squished next to him, oblivious to the fact this was happening. I turned the iPod to him so he could see.

"Your 20th birthday," he said happily.

I nodded, as I typed in my passcode. 8008. Ian set it to that one day as a joke, saying it looked like "BooB" and I hadn't changed it back. No matter how stupid, it was a memory. I immediately turned on one of the most calming songs I had, and the one that made me think of Ian. It was "Please Don't Go" by Barcelona. I laid peacefully in the bed, eyes closed, listening to the soft music start.

.~.

"All those arrows you threw you them away/ You kept falling in love and then one day/ When you fell you fell towards me/ When you crashed in the clouds you found me..."

.~.

It reminded me of all those times that I saw Ian with his other girlfriend, Maisie. It hurt me to see him with someone else. I wanted to be her, the one that hugged him. I remembered that Ian was still in the room. I felt the bed shift as he sat down, grabbing my hand and holding it tight. The part of the song that made my heart twist started.

.~.

"Oh, please don't go/ I want you so/ I can't let go/ for I lose control..."

.~.

I took a couple of deep breaths, reminding myself that Ian was here. And he wasn't leaving. He leaned over, his lips softly touching mine, before laying down beside me. His arm draped over my stomach. His touch was calming. The music continued softly.

"What are we?" I asked softly. I felt my eyes droop in sleepiness, even though I had slept a ton.

"Humans," He said jokingly. I felt his steady breath on my neck.

"I mean us," I whispered. I turned my head more to look him in the eyes.

"Riley, you're my girlfriend," He opened his eyes for a second before closing them again. Apparently he was still as exhausted as I was.

"Good," I closed my eyes again, letting the sleepiness overtake me.

.~.

"Oh, please don't go/ I want you so/ I can't let go/ For I lose control..."

.~.

**~Ian's POV~**

I felt her breath become steady and slow, as the song peacefully ended. I realized how much this song related to how much we just went through. I almost lost her. I had begged her not to leave me. I quietly grabbed her iPod, typing in 8008. I couldn't help but chuckle a little. I played the song again, letting my mind focus on the sad, soft tones of the music. I kept replaying it, keeping watch over Riley while she napped. I was tired too, but I couldn't sleep. The song ended once more, and all that could be heard was the soft chatter from people beyond the door. A moment later, my phone started to ring.

"SHUT UP!" The familiar ring sounded, letting me know it was Anthony calling. I smothered the phone in my jacket, nearly jumping off of the bed. _Dang it, Anthony. _I thought. I didn't want to wake Riley. Once outside the door, I answered.

"Hello?"

"Hey, how did it go?" Anthony's calm voice came through clearly.

"Good, the therapist said she is already doing better than expected," I peeked through the small window on the door, seeing Riley move a bit, then become still again.

"Good, I'm glad! Can we come back and visit?" I heard the grandparents chattering in the background.

"You can, she just won't be awake. She's still really tired," I tried and failed to stifle a yawn.

"Sounds like you are too," He said chuckling.

"Yeah, I should get back to her," I smiled at a passing nurse, as Anthony responded.

"Alright, we'll give you some time to rest, but then we really want to visit again,"

"Ok," I yawned again. We said goodbye, and I quietly entered back into the dark, silent room. I laid back down next to Riley, taking her back up into my arms. I drifted off to sleep to the sound of her steady breathing.

.~.

A week had passed since that night, and Riley had improved greatly. She was walking around like normal, and she had gained a little of her weight back. The glow was back in those brilliant green eyes. She was out of the hospital, and went back in her apartment, even though I wished for other arrangements. But things weren't like they were before. We were a couple, and in love. Now instead of playful nudges we hugged. We still had those little nudges and arm punches, but they had a different feel to them. And kissing. It was a whole new thing being able to finally kiss her, after all those years of just being friends.

"Ready to go?" Riley asked, walking out of the bathroom. I nodded and we headed to the garage, out to my car.

We were going to see a movie, something we hadn't had the chance to do in a while. It was a normal event before our world crashed and burned. We would go to a movie, and make funny comments throughout, trying to make each other burst out in laughter. We would get a few judgemental stares, but we didn't care. We were in our own perfect world. I was looking forward to returning to that.

We arrived at the theater to see it was completely packed. We had to park in the back of the parking lot, and watch for the crazy people that blazed through. We made it inside, and got in line to buy our tickets. I noticed Riley was unusually tense.

"Are you ok?" I asked softly, placing my hand on the small of her back. She nodded slightly.

"Yeah, I'm fine," She walked forward to occupy the empty space in the moving line.

"Hi, two tickets for _Iron Man 3_ please," I told the worker. She printed them out and handed them to me.

"Hey, aren't you from Smosh?" She asked curiously. No doubt she was making sure it was really me.

"Uh, yeah," I smiled awkwardly. I didn't want this evening to be just about that one guy from Smosh. This night was about Riley and I, together.

"I love your videos!" She said, smiling ecstatically.

"Thanks," I pulled Riley quickly away. I could tell she didn't love the attention. We got our popcorn and pop, and headed for the theater. There was a crowd of people trying to get through the double doors. We got pulled into the middle of it, and we flooded into the theater. I swiftly lead her to two empty seats in the middle of a row.

"Wow, it's crazy out there," I said, munching on a handful of popcorn. I got no response from Riley.

"Are you sure you're ok?" I put my arm over her shoulders, trying to give her some comfort from whatever was bothering her. She just shrugged, her arms crossed in front of her belly.

.~.

**~Riley's POV~**

I didn't want to ruin the evening. This was the first time in a long while that we had gone to do a normal activity together. But I couldn't help what I was feeling on the inside.

The crowd. The noise. My brain was yelling at me to get out. My mouth wouldn't work. I couldn't tell Ian I wanted to leave. I really did want to have fun and spend time with him. But I felt like I couldn't escape, I was surrounded by people and their annoying voices trying to shout over each other in the mess of people. They were screaming at me. At least, that's what I felt was happening. They were closing in on me, not giving me any route to exit. Again, all in my brain. But it was overwhelming. I felt myself close my eyes, trying to escape into an imaginary world since I couldn't find space in the physical one. It took me a minute to realize that Ian was talking to me, trying to get an answer.I lifted myself out of the safe haven in my brain, and instead focused on his face.

"Hello? Riley?" He was shaking my arm slightly, his facial features almost terrified.

"Ugh... Sorry," I said softly. I felt my breathing grow slightly faster as the piercing mob of voices entered my ears once again. "Ian..." I put my head on his shoulder, hoping it would act as a tent to protect me from the crowd.

"Come on," He took my hand, and dragged me from my seat, leaving our snacks behind. We walked out of the theater, and into the nearly empty lobby. He grabbed my shoulders once we were alone, and stared straight into my eyes. "Riley, what's wrong?"

I shook my head. How could I possibly explain this? I knew what I felt. I just couldn't put it into words.

"I don't know," I finally answered. "I guess the crowd is just overwhelming," I choked back the anxiety that had built up as a lump in my throat, and took deep breaths.

"Do you want to home and watch a movie there? It is quite crazy here," He gave me a reassuring smile. I just nodded, and he walked me straight out of the theater and back to the car.

"Thanks," I whispered, once we were alone in the quietness of the car. He leaned silently over the car console, kissing me gently on the cheek.

"Anytime," Was all he said.

I curled up on the passenger seat, hugging my knees as we made the silent journey home. Ian's Coldplay CD was playing peacefully in the background, helping me ease my mind. My mind went over what happened at the theater. What I felt. Why I felt it. What was wrong with me? First my major depression and coma, and now this crazy episode. All I could think about was Ian's heart of gold. How could he still love me with all of my problems? In my mind, I wouldn't be able to handle it. I would think a person like that is broken beyond repair. He has all his problems to deal with, and now he had taken on mine as well.

"I'm a broken person, Ian," I whispered. He didn't say a word. I saw his brow furrow, in his adorable thinking state. After a minute, his smooth voice broke through the music.

"We both are. But that's why we're together. So we can repair each other," He turned into the driveway of the Smosh house, and looked at me. "Don't worry. We all have imperfections,"


End file.
